@#$%!

I flew into Eugene from Las Vegas Sunday morning, thinking about what a strange city Vegas is. This is no earth-shattering revelation, I realize, but it stands in such stark contrast to the experience I will be embarking on--much sooner than feels comfortable, might I add--that I feel compelled to mention it. Vegas is many things--again, no big surprise here--and as much as I genuinely enjoy a good break from reality, which you can get in Vegas in a much more potent dose than just about anywhere else, I realized this trip that it's the complete lack of soul that makes 3 nights there about as much as I can spend without risking my own soul. It was interesting this trip to note how much of the L.A. club/image-is-everything culture has invaded the Vegas casino climate as well. Weird. Even though Jenn and I had a great time, I can't help wondering if I'm glad I "voted with my debit card" in support of this city that does nothing but encourage the worst aspects of human nature. Then again, I can also see where maybe Craig Lannom was right in remarking that we need places that are sort of beyond the boundaries of what society generally accepts in order to allow people to blow off steam, and help us appreciate the existence and geography of our boundaries.

That being said, I had a mini-meltdown today with a customer service representative for ING and realized that it was probably a great example of what psychologists refer to as "displaced emotion". Was I really upset about the messed up PIN number? Or was I taking advantage of an opportunity to express some emotion (speaking of blowing off steam!) about this crazy-ass (frankly) teaching assignment I've agreed to? Um, I'm going to take Door Number 2, Bob!

Seriously! What the @#$% have I gotten myself into? I get on a place in THREE WEEKS. Holy @#$%-ing @#$%.